Basket Case (1982)

So I’m a big fan of alone time. What with my brain being such a busy place, and the fact that I really don’t like people in general, it’s good to shut the door on the world and do whatever the hell you want to do, how you want to do it, without the interruptions, inane chitchat or loud breathing (close your damn mouth for frack sake or stop altogether!) that makes you want to re enact scenes from horror films just to bring the quiet.

…Just me then?

Siamese twins however, don’t have that luxury of shutting the door in their siblings face after an argument about who gets the remote, because the poor bastard has to follow them wherever they may go, making the whole dramatic exit option rather moot, to say the least. Some of these two headed Todds’ live fun and happy, lives that would put my dull little existence to shame … or at least that’s what the movie Stuck on You lead me to believe (I tuned out after the opening credits so I could be wrong about this), but mostly, if there is an option of separation, then that is the most popular scenario for most conjoined pairs.

Or is it …

Duane is a weird kid. He carries with him a large basket (geddit?) everywhere he goes. Now it’s not a picnic hamper filled with a edible delights for his honey, more the home of his mutant twin whom he was separated from at birth. They just aren’t happy about the whole individual lives deal, and go on a vengeful mission to punish the doctors involved in the operation by cutting those cruel medical fiends in half. The basket case, or half man half fleshy pancake, that he is, tends to throw murderous tantrums though, when Duane leaves him alone for his own selfish reasons, like picking up chicks with bad wigs for example, so you know things are going to end well ..

Basket Case is one of the most fantastic low budget horrors in existence. It is, without doubt, pure unadulterated, camped up, sleaze, while still managing to be equally tragic and terrifying. It’s about familial love, jealously, and some well deserved payback. Being a huge fan of Ray Harryhausen, I was completely charmed by the stop motion techniques used for the mutant, which manage to be both hilarious and surprisingly creepy all at once. Grainy, trashy, and with acting that makes you reconsider the work of Rob ‘’You Can Do It’’ Schneider, it should have been a disaster, but ye gads, somehow, it works.

If you wish for simpler times, big hair, hookers with hearts of gold, and blood soaked wicker baskets, then boy, this film will make your dreams come true.
And if this is how small and frankly, whacked out your dreams are, then kid, get some psychiatric help, now.

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